“How will I dance now?”

One of the most touching and aggravating things I’ve read in months. I wanted to share it with as many people as possible. 

Thanks, Allison…


Poem for Today


When despair for the world grows in me
and I wake in the night at the least sound
in fear of what my life and my children’s lives may be,
I go and lie down where the wood drake
rests in his beauty on the water, and the great heron feeds.
I come into the peace of wild things
who do not tax their lives with forethought
of grief. I come into the presence of still water.
And I feel above me the day-blind stars
waiting with their light. For a time
I rest in the grace of the world, and am free.
— Wendell Berry


Wendell Berry, “The Peace of Wild Things” from The Selected Poems of Wendell Berry. Copyright © 1998. ( www.perseusbooks.com). All rights reserved.

Source: Collected Poems, 1957-1982 (1985)

A retreat

It’s always nice to get away.
It’s especially nice if you’re with someone you love whom you don’t get to see often enough.
It’s even better when you’re able to learn something and maybe help someone else at the same time.

All those things happened last weekend.
Ken and I joined others at the Rising Hope Retreat, a retreat for HIV+ people and their partners or other significant support people, coordinated by FDH and Associates and sponsored with prevention grants from the State and Federal governments.
We had Paul Dalton in from Oakland California, a genuine expert in the field of HIV medication and science of treatment. He gave treatment updates and we had all the time we needed to pick his brain about our particular issues with treatment, and get his opinion on side effects, collateral issues and generally, just enjoy his company. He’s a great guy.
My friend Lindsey Doe, Clinical sexologist was there to help us negotiate in relationships and give human sexuality feedback. There was a body movement workshop, staying healthy discussion, medical marijuana update and Ken and I led an addiction/mental health discussion.
It was great. I felt like part of a team, not just the Ken and Greg team, but a team working to help people live more full lives in the face of fear, uncertainty and some very serious health issues- happens with everyone as they age, I guess. And we were aging. Not dying.
I also love the Feathered Pipe Ranch where we stayed- such a beautiful, peaceful and spiritual place- and the food was awesome!
For me, someone who rarely gets time for himself, it was time to treasure. And to get to share it with my partner was even better.

Creating a pearl

“Do you know how pearls are made?” the old man asked me.

“An irritant enters the shell of the oyster, sometimes very small, sometimes not so small. The oyster, aware of its pain, begins to cover the irritant’s jagged edges with a solution created from inside itself. It will continue to cover the invader until what we know as a pearl is formed.

The oyster is not angry, it does not question, it does not hate the irritant, it simply and slowly responds according to its nature and creates, out of pain, a jewel.”

“Creating a pearl takes pain and turns it into trust. No wonder they are so valuable.”



I was being interviewed last Sunday on Leslie Cunningham’s radio show, when I had a sudden realization.
Well, it wasn’t sudden in the sense of being hit with something, it was more like I finally understood the relationship of a scientific principle to its practical counterpart in nature; pheromones, for instance.
I realized that I was talking freely about myself to God knows how many people and I wasn’t afraid.
I wasn’t thinking about editing myself to protect my own ego or anybody else’s for that matter. I talked openly about growing up gay in rural Montana, leaving the priesthood, having HIV and finding love in a culture that doesn’t recognize me equally under the law. I talked about personal philosophy, about faith, about not fearing the future and about living positively, every day.
I remember from childhood always deeply self-editing my comments for shameful content, real, perceived or imagined. I spent so much time being careful, I was confused about my true thoughts and feelings. I mostly grew out of that, especially after the imposed guilt and shame were addressed, but really, I felt the absence of that habit most keenly on Sunday, talking to Leslie. It was an evolutionary step in a life that continues to amaze me.
Here I am. Take it or leave it.

I think I’ll take it.

New Look-

So, I got a little tired of the old format and decided to change it up.

I like the new thing. It lets me put my own picture as the header. Above is Michael Skellig off the West Coast of Ireland- I was looking down from the top of the peak to snap the picture…

Yay! let me know if you like it…

Speaking of Faith

I just finished listening to “Speaking of Faith” by Krista Tippett on Audiobook, and I must say, it quite stretched my imagination on the subject.
I’ve always had a strong sense of the divine and the eternal, In fact, I can’t remember when I haven’t, but to listen to the voices of others who struggle daily to put into words and actions the vision of their experience was very inspiring. I was inspired whether I agreed or disagreed, whether I understood or I didn’t. The inspiration came from the conviction and quiet, kind, loving pursuit of truth- held in stark contrast to extremists and emotionally reckless fundamentalists who have lost themselves in being the bully on the World’s Playground.

I highly recommend this audiobook-Krista’s voice is great for listening, and her words are very well chosen. I plan on purchasing the book itself for reference and the podcast is available on iTunes….


” The happiness of most people we know is not ruined by great catastrophes or fatal errors, but by the repetition of slowly destructive little things.”
-Ernest Dimnet