Presence

People often ask me how I listen to other people all day long and not go crazy. First of all, I don’t really ever look at what I do as “listening to people’s problems”. Yesterday, I was asked for some words to describe what I do, and my philosophy for doing it, and I came up with this:

Other people’s problems are exactly that.
Making them your own is not only arrogant- it’s unhealthy, exhausting and robs people of the creative pain that makes a life rich.
Being with them as they go through it is a privilege, but it is not always a call to action.
Presence is worth more than all the advice in the world. 

Works for me…

Good Advice

~ Still need to learn how to do this better…

Dear Moms and Dads,

Parents of LGBT kids don’t have an easy time of it. Parenting a child is difficult at the best of times, but adding the complexities of sexual diversity to the mix can make parenting downright terrifying.

It’s worse if those parents are practicing Christians.

Kathy Baldock writes clearly and firmly to Christian parents of LGBT kids in her latest post at CanyonWalker Connections. She’s not advocating marching in parades and becoming a fierce advocate and PFLAG zealot, she’s advocating simple acceptance.
Excerpt:

Kathy and friends

If God has given you a gay child and you are trying to make that child heterosexual, that is not “the way of him”. If you try to impose change on your child or reject who he is (yes, that is really what you are doing when you tell them to “not be gay”), there are some general , predictable consequences.

If you reject your glbt youth they:

  • Are EIGHT times more apt to attempt suicide than those who are accepted
  • May suffer depression SIX times more often than those who are accepted
  • Are THREE times more likely to get involved in drug abuse than those glbt that are accepted
  • May contract HIV and STD’s THREE times more than accepted glbt youth

Are you catching the key words here? “than those who are accepted”   The unhealthy, risky behavior is a result of rejection.  Mom and Dad, you are completely in control of that dynamic.  If you withhold love, acceptance or security from you glbt youth because of their sexual orientation, you will, in all likelihood, be damning them to these statistics. I cannot imagine any parent knowing this and choosing to ignore it.

If you’re the parent of a gay kid and don’t know what to do, contanct me. I’m available.

If you’re an LGBT kid who’s been rejected and kicked out of the house- or is about to be, contact me. We’ll find a safe place for you to be. Promise.

My email: Dgsma@hotmail.com.

Please read Kathy’s full post here.
And then share it with your friends and Christian parents.