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Tag Archives: growing up gay
A Thirst For Justice
This was my reflection at the Bozeman Unitarian Universalist Fellowship this morning for their “LGBT Voices” service.
I grew up in the 70’s. A Roman Catholic. Back then, the emphasis was less on “Roman” and more on “Catholic”. Catholic as you might know means “Universal”.
My religious training as a kid was very ecumenical, non-dogmatic, fresh on the heels of Pope John’s Vatican Council- designed to open the windows and doors of the church for some fresh air- and as such, there was a heavy emphasis on social justice and the dignity of the human person. I had wonderful teachers, nuns, priests, parents, and peers- and we all believed steadfastly in this principle probably first espoused by Confucius:
“Do not impose on others what you do not wish for yourself.”
This, it seems, is one of the crowning principles of justice.
“Do not impose on others what you do not wish for yourself”
And I loved it- I still do. It guides my life even today.
But what I wished for myself was peace- and it was jeopardized, in some part, by the dogmatic underpinnings of shame in the faith that taught me those strong tenets of social justice. Something wasn’t quite right- and it took me decades to reconcile it. I was born, some have said, “disordered”. Simply because of something that flowed from the depths of my being, from my heart: I wanted to fall in love with another man.
Words like “disordered” or “unnatural” get thrown around a lot by people who really aren’t willing to try and understand. They may find it more comfortable to sit in judgment, without trying to sit in empathy or compassion. Possibly because they lack the imagination to believe that God could truly surprise the world.
But seriously, if that’s not something God would do, there’s not much point in being God, is there?
But there it is. This is who I am.
And I’m not alone. There are millions of people, like myself who are born out of the course of “normal”. For some it’s sexuality, for some it’s different senses of beauty or reason or silence or vision. It’s all the same.
I realized that sense of justice that I was born with, that sense of “Do not impose on others what you do not wish for yourself” must be followed by that which is like it “Do not take away from others what you do not wish to take away from yourself.”
LGBT persons must not be oppressed- we must be included, we must be loved- not only in spirit, but in person. For me, this is peace. This is justice.
And keeping me and my sisters and brothers and friends from achieving the same level of happiness as they enjoy is unjust. It’s unfair, and it’s spiteful.
This is the civil rights issue of our day. This is the moral rights issue of our day. And I’m not just talking about churches and theology here. As one nun I know and love reminded me recently “freedom of religion also means freedom from religion.” I don’t have the right to force my religious beliefs on anyone, but conversely, no one has the right to force theirs on me. Which seems to happen a lot sometimes- the forcing of belief on others. I have freedom of religion, so I’m going to use it, not abuse it.
My religion is based on love.
Right now, in Montana, there is a campaign to have fairness for all couples- regardless of sexuality. It represents everything I believe: that I deserve the same protections as my parents had. It’s called the Fair is Fair Campaign– and I have enough bumper stickers for every car in the parking lot….
I left Montana for 10 years, but I promised myself when I moved back, that I would not hide who I am, that I would “suffer the slings and arrows” if it meant that a kid who grew up here would have a better life than I did. Because there’s nothing shameful about being who you were created to be.
And, because love is always optimistic, I hope and I trust that just maybe, someday, sooner than later, we’ll all believe that.
- Mitt Romney Denies Freedom of Religion (alternet.org)
- Obama Defends Freedom of Religion (chuck-watts.org)
- Faith groups come together to launch social justice organization in Nevada (bikyamasr.com)
- Is It a Coincidence that Coming Out Day and Vatican II’s Anniversary Are Today? (newwaysministryblog.wordpress.com)
- Greer Among Young NW LGBTQ Leaders Invited to The White House (dgsmith.org)
- Resigned Priests Come Out For Marriage Equality (dgsmith.org)
I’ve been busy with clients and doing an interview (which includes editing- my first crack at it) with Jason Marsden, Executive Director of the Matthew Shepard Foundation, to air on SameSexSunday.
I have to say, it was fascinating- both the interview and the process. We discussed the Wyoming legislature’s attempt to repeal a 130 year-old law recognizing all legal marriages performed elsewhere- and right now, that includes same-sex marriages. We talked about being a gay, rural kid and country-style activism, and finally, about what the Matthew Shepard Foundation is up to.
Like I said good stuff. I’ll put up the links when I get them.
You are subscribing to SameSexSunday, aren’t you?
Gregory Hinton on “Home Ground”
My dear friend and Out West Executive Producer, Gregory Hinton did a radio interview with Brian Kahn on Home Ground for Yellowstone Public Radio recently.
He talks about growing up in the American West as a gay man, expressing articulately and beautifully many of the struggles that we all share. He also speaks to the need for greater understanding of the gifts and stories that LGBT persons bring to our life here.
Listen to the program. (29 mins)